The clearest thing to me is that I don't notice anything anymore! Trying to stay in the present. I've been working on tracking my thoughts, and I'm always thinking of the past or the future, never enjoying today. Granted, today usually sucks, but maybe it's because I'm so worried about everything else.
I give in so easily to my impulses. I don't think this is always a bad thing. And I'm afraid now that I'm single again, I'll be back to my old maninizing ways. Oh well. It's better when you don't let anyone too close, at least with things being the way they are.
It's funny, really. The way life is lived in cycles. I don't know why we're still under the impression that time is this linear thing, or experience is linear, with concrete lessons and results. Things end and begin again, over and over. Sometimes all at the same time. Everything just comes back around. I don't know if this is liberating or immobilizing, but at least I know it's true.
No comments:
Post a Comment