Diseased

I really hate all these new faggoty ass problems I've been having lately. It's along the lines of me turning into a pathetic pseudo insomnic, anorexic, OCD, schizophrenic sociopath.
Of course, I'm exaggerating, but I'm starting to feel like a character of Girl, Interrupted, especially with all of these crime shows I watch, because I find myself relating more to the serial killers than the people they've killed. I am just way too aware of the evil inside of me, and it's beginning to become much more real than it actually is.
I feel like Grissom. Where does my mind end and the minds of those who are truly "evil" begin? Because really, we are all the same. Just because I can control my evil impulses doesn't make them any less evil. It's just not there for all to see.
Now, don't misinterpret this to believe that I want to kill people. All I'm saying is that I'm starting to lose my mind. Although one can be mentally sound and still completely evil. I think a few Star Wars and Harry Potter references would come into play nicely here.

Oh, sanity. One of the many privileges we take for granted. Congratulations to those whose is still intact.

Letters to Anakin

Dear Anakin,
I know I said I was going to stop writing letters to you, but now that I started my blog up again, I feel like maybe we can start a new relationship. And it's not like I haven't been writing you the occasional letter since I was eight years old, but I think this is when we're going to get to the good stuff.
I was going over Return of the Jedi in my mind again, and I realized my favorite part is actually the part where you're practically killing your son. It's the final battle, I'm sure you remember, and it was really cool because you're electrifying him. Personally, Luke was a lot different in that movie, and so ready to die for what he believed in, which was awesome. But then again, so were you. Which was not awesome. You had so many opportunities to become good again, man, but I know how it is with the power and everything. It really is blinding. Speaking of blinding, back to my point. The coolest part is the lame lighting rods coursing through his body, because his teeth turn purple with electricity.
Really awesome.
And yeah, that's about it. That was my favorite part.
But it reminded me of the fact that you really didn't seem to have a lot of sympathy, let alone empathy, towards your son. I could tell that you thought he was weak for not following you in your path. Really, I hope you learned your lesson about weakness that day. Obviously, because you died. But what I'm saying is, it takes real courage to choose the road Luke chose, the road you had been on all along. I know all the shit I talked about him before, but I take back everything I've said about Luke, because really, he is one of the greatest most lion-hearted characters in existence because he gave up everything and risked all he had left to serve justice and righteousness. And I don't care what anyone says, I can see it in your eyes, and I know you know what is right in your heart of hearts. You took the easy way out, because it is so much easier to be evil. It takes strength to put your heart on the line and fight for what you know is right.
But that's all I have to say to you right now, because I'm still a little pissed.